I really can't believe it holy shit.
This is actually happening, it actually exists.
Only 128 and apparently some tracks cut off? But I waited years for this I'm not gonna wait another second.
Riff Raff - Neon Icon
1. Introducing the Icon
Oh my god these bros are just saying exactly what I'm feeling. Riff Raff off the chain! Jody Highroller! She doesn't even grow hair on her body! Oh shit HERE WE GO OUTER SPACE LIKE ORION'S BELT. Oh my god this beat is really bumping. "She was grabbing on my shlong doing hand stands" "I can do the math but I choose to take a nap" "I'm the white Gucci Mane with a spray tan" oh my god oh my god I can't process this this is just riff raff overload. Hahaha oh my god Diplo hahaha take that hahahaha "You really shouldn't say that" hahaha. Oh my god this is already one of his best verses ever I think howwwwwww OH MY GOD THIS DESCRIPTION OF HIS HOUSE. "My wood wheel is a blue spruce" My jaw is like permanently dropped. This is just like... like what could I possibly say about this? "HOPE YOU READY FOR THE NEON ICON, IT JUST DROPPED RIGHT NOW" oh my god here we go aaaaaa **
Haha this is a real buttrocky guitar, I love it. Oh my god we are just PARTY MODE now. "We were up all night on ko-kayne!" he BROUGHT OUT THE RICE, he said not to make him do that. This is such an active and varied flow and he's still dropping all the Riff classics, skin tone the same as the french toast, whaaaaaaat. Just on the strength of these first two tracks being what they are I'm gonna listen to this album a hundred times. "White Chris Rock" hahaha aahahahaha "Sliding through your city on a turtle shell" This is like maximum fun, the only way someone could dislike this is if they were playing it on their shitty laptop speakers or some shit omg. I'm having too much fun right now this has to be illegal. WE WERE UP ALL NIGHT oh my god there's like a straight rock feel and then these vocals **
3. Wetter than Tsunami
Ooooh this beat, "Ice on my hand and I shoulda run a grammy" "Step in the club and I'm smelling like Miami" oh man "Kitchen cooking cookies but I'm not your damn granny". "I can make it rain even on a sunny day" just shit like that... him going out of his way to say this... "Laughing at the bank, man that shit is comical", the way he says "comical" more quickly to stay on beat... that's classic Riff man omg. This beat is so trill. I love the little vocal modulations they do. "Ice in my ear looks like a baby penguin". This is so good. Such a solid track. So many good lines. Such a bumpin beat. *
4. Jody 3 Moons (skit)
Hahaha oh man this is hilarious, this I'm so happy he's doing this... "It's the actual moon" "I want you to be nice to everyone around"... cry like "Versace raindrops"... ohhhh man.
5. Versace Python
Oooh what do we have here? Spacey stuff... People were really hype for this track. Okay yeahhhhhhhhh I'm feeling this. I love when he does this falsetto voice. Oh my god this is so dreamy... I feel like I can just float away to this and oh man that beat, "Now I'm in Chinatown, BOK CHOY", sweeeet. Oh man he brought back that sick hook from "Jody Highroller", he's just flowing along, doing whatever he wants, this is so beautiful... "When I wake up, it's a mystery/every time I open my mouth, history", I love the way he switches between rapping and singing, so smooooth. Omg how can he make music this good, I love this track way too much, I want to listen to it just all the time from now on. ***
6. Lava Glaciers
Ft. Donald Glover noooooo OH SHIT BUT HARRY FRAUD, okay yeah I'm feeling this, as long as Chiddy Gambiny isn't too tryhard, he seems like the anti-Riff Raff, what a change choice. Oh man he's rocking this sick accent, this is the best. Oh my god he's just going completely off. Whenever he does that thing where he just keeps going, bizarre Sonic the Hedgehog joke wtf, like, he just goes in, things transcend the sense/nonsense dichotomy. Okay this isn't so bad, he's just sorta vibing along here, I don't really care for him rapping about this sort of thing, seems inappropriate at this juncture, but okay okay it's okay. Like I dunno that emoji's line was pretty lame, whatever, this is acceptable... Like I'm not gonna skip it or anything but Jesus you're on a Riff Raff album you should have a bit more fun. This beat is SO SICK btw. Harry Fraud like up there with Clams and Hot Sugar in my mind atm, just so creative, so varied, so beautiful. Awww yesss jungle noises outro. S+
7. Tip Toe Wing in My Jawwwdinz
Uhhh did he actually make this shoe? That seems impossible but okay yes sick. Oh man this flow is so powerful, so triumphant. "TV screen in my left pocket", "Dyslexic in the 4-door mango lexus" "Tip toeing through my bat cave" okay I think I misparsed the title, or maybe it suggests BOTH, how genius. "My Brazilian twins got flagged and deported" "Damn!" hahahahahahahaha "You can sleep outside, here's my Versace sleeping bag" how much versace will I end up buying because of hip hop? I already bought socks lmao. Wow the bass on this is pretty sick. S
8. Maybe You Love Me
Woah this beat, I love that bend, that sorta twangy feel. I love that he left all the DJ tags on, I love the sound of DJ tags. Okay yeah this is straight bumping. "Rap game LeBron James" and then okay the beat coming on hard here this is too real. I really like this vocalist, all of these seem like they could be club bangers. "My shoelaces is iguana" haha omg. "You should practice martial arts the way you karate chop my heart :(" Yeah this is pretty hype. Hahaha no auto tune wtf I don't understand. S+
9. Aquaberry Dolphin
haha sweet MAC MILLER, i really like him these days. "The lime benz, candy coated with the applesauce", even the title has this sweet aesthetic. "Aw shit look who it is, the white Wesley Snipes" hahahaha "Mi casa so big it took the maids a week to clean" "I can freestyle to a dolphin and a tambourine", being demonstrated atm. Mac going in really sick, he really understands what it means to be on a Riff Raff track, he's having a lot of fun. "These hoes look thirsty and I look like pink lemonade" hahaha. *
10. The Bloomingdales at Windshire Palace (skit)
hahahaaa what is he doing. This is so silly. This accent is too ridiculous oh my god, so silly. I feel like his accent is drifting "my grandfather just knitted me some stockings" hahaha. The whistling omg. "A big stupid 2-for-1 special" hahaha hahaha. Good job Jody.
Okay yes this is a classic, coming back. A nice sentimental song. Oooh he's remixed it though, this is nice and full, the beat is pretty bumpin. This song has a really sweet music video, the original. This whole song is so strange like, it's so sincere, but it's so different than everything else he's done, it's like he woke up with a weird obsession to record a country hit and then it went away as soon as he made it. I wonder what actual fans of this sorta music would think of this. I know that I like it. It's so simple but sincere and the message is so universal. The most down to earth song. Feels like it's shaking your hand or something. I like how he mixes it up for the ending, with a more dramatic sorta flow. It's like... a cute kinda song. Very endearing. Riff Raff is so endearing in general, he's so moe. *
12. How to Be the Man
Okay yeah this was a single, and a straight banger, hell yes. "Seven coats of the gloss" that's a lot of paint. Oh man I'm so excited for the remix of this at the end of the album. Woah I didn't realize this was DJ Mustard. "Might be Adam Sandler and my cup is Pink Panther" damn I love when his references don't make sense haha. "Rap game Uncle Ben pullin' rice out the oven" hahaha man so many good lines here, "Oh shit look who it is it's the white Eddy Murphy". Man yeah this is obviously DJ Mustard now that I think about it. So trill. haha oh no it cuts off gotta wait for legit rip *
13. Cool it Down
Hmmm yeah this is pretty cool... nice and smooth, these vocals are nice. "Been grinding twenty years like a damn fool" damn man this sorta line, what do you make of it? Oh man he's layering his sung vocals that's so sweet, that's smooth. "Glacierberry watch got time frozen" haha oh man he's saying some REALLY AMAZING STUFF "If I had listened to your bitch ass I wouldn't be Riff Raff" yesssssss awesome. This is sweet this is so smooth. Oh no also cut off I think... *
14. Vip Pass To My Heart
Woah this beat yeah okay yeah I like this, I love these modulated vocals, this is pretty sweet already. Space jam sorta thing. Oh man and there's a beat coming up this is like the most fun part of the club experience, when stuff like this comes on I think. I have no idea what he's saying lmao "It'd be a shame if you don't open it"? awww... how cute. He's so endearing oh my god you just want to root for him in every capacity. Wow he isn't gonna rap on this really at all that's kinda disappointing, the beat is so good, but his knowing when not to do that is another amazing quality of his. This is nice, just smooth vibing music, smooth very smooth rap music. S+
15. How to Be the Man (Houston Remix)
Awwww yes Paul Wall was Riff Raff before Riff Raff was on this. I wish this was a biiiiig Texas super cut with Trae and Z-Ro and Bun B and shit but this is really sick too. Slim Thug man "I been the boss since I left Swisher House" damn man like, there's such a gravity to a voice like this. "Versace car alarm" "Roll through your city smelling like lightning storm" man "Rap game Sadie Hawkins got a ticket for jaywalking" haha man "4 story house as I recline on versace couch" maaaaaaaaaaaan he's going all out on the remix verse, good shit wow. Now Paaaaul, 2 cups. 48 for the watch, hundred dollar socks, damn. "Full of more meds than the cancer patient" "No keys, start the car with the iPad/Drank stains on the shirt is the new fad" maaaan. Good job everybody. Great album. **
WOW IT ACTUALLY EXISTS AND I HEARD IT
And I will hear it again A HUNDRED MORE TIMES.
I'd like to put in to words what I like about Riff Raff but first I want to just enjoy listening to it a few more times while thinking as little as possible.
That seems like a cop-out sorry maybe I'll say more things on my year end list, if this doesn't make top 10 then like uhhhhhhhhhh.